World is a Funny Place

The idea of being an optimistic person always intrigues me. Do good and good thing will happen to you, try your best and all your effort will be paid off, you can do it! dreams come true. Wow...all these idealism seems perfect, even for a person like me. 

Lol..don't get me wrong, I am not being cynical here. I said that because I personally ever believed in it, once.

I've attempted to being an optimistic for several times. I swear lol…but at the same time somehow circumstances always get in the way and do not allowed me to do so.

I just confronted some people related to my work yesterday –which I shall not mention who- because in my logic, what they have been doing is professionally wrong. But since -for your information- some of them are in higher level than me, basically I’ve done a suicide action. It is only a matter of time until something bad happens to me. I am stupid by nature btw, so I have no one to blame lol.

How naïve I am…thinking that someone in my current level could make a change. Could expand a better choice. If I was in a superhero movie, the story must ended by a picture perfect scene of me facing the sunset while smiling gracefully. But honestly, let me tell you my friend, something that happens in movies never actually happens in real life unless it is a documentary or biography movie (the ironic part is, successful biography movie always shows that at some points, the protagonists suffer inevitable sacrifice in order to achieve whatever they pursue-. I should’ve had taken note from that.

The real world is a funny place indeed.

Sometimes, the right thing to do is not even on the option list. And if we try to put it in, we, and our whole action, –without a second thought- would be considered as a nonsensical act. That is not even the worst part yet, after all those intimidation, by the end of the day they finally success on making us doubt ourselves and we start to believe that what we do is wrong. We are the one at fault.

My stupid action that I’ve done was not followed by a good response. I was determined as a threat instead. But I won’t say that I regret it. In fact, I am relieved since I already said what I have to say. Sounds cliché but I always believe that ignorance is wayyyyy more dangerous that the state of not knowing, moreover, if the one who choose to be an ignorant is a figure who has strong influence to the community.

Hence, being an optimistic sounds like a joke to me.

I am sorry, I am not trying to be mean or something. But as you already know…World itself doesn’t allowed me to be an optimistic.

lol

*yes, this is a sarcastic lol*

*Im not happy of the person I've become too, don't worry*

lol

*and this one is my sincere lol, lol*